Knowing Your Child

Yesterday I wrote the post Children Have Their Own Path and Purpose, about my belief that all children come in our lives  with their own path, plan, and purpose. Seeing my children as they are is my most important work. All other parenting is built upon seeing them.

Please join me this week in spending time being curious about our children. Let's look not through the lens of what they 'should' be or what is normal which only sees them in comparison to others, but through a more open lens.

Can you make a list of adjectives that describe your child? If possible, use non-judging words, looking beyond words that may focus on your child's affect on you (easy, difficult, lovable, needy) and considering more neutral words (active, careful, calm, bold).

As you think about that child, consider how they respond to:

• new people and places?
• a crowd?
• an old friend?
• a predictable routine?
• changes in routine?
• a much-loved animal?
• a strange animal?

How do they approach:

• cleaning up?
• a physical challenge?
• something they have never done before?
• new foods?

How do they handle:

• being tired?
• feeling restless?
• boredom?
• things that are too hard to do?
• hurt feelings?

When do they turn toward you and when do they turn away?
Do they have characteristic behaviors (cuddling up in a blanket? standing on a swing?)?
What do you notice about their facial expressions and gestures?

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