Sometimes our kids aren't cooperating with our idea of how things should be. Maybe they're sleeping poorly, bickering over toys, or screentime, rolling their eyes at our funny jokes, ignoring the schoolwork that we know they should be doing, etc.
When we aren't feeling happy or proud or satisfied or even calm, it's good to remember that they aren't here to make us happy. They aren't here to make us proud. They aren't here to make us feel satisfied or calm.
It's up to us. Can we free them from the responsibility to make us happy or proud? Can we be responsible for our own needs and feelings and allow them to be the messy, beautiful beings they are here to be? Let's enjoy the relationship we actually have with them, the ways they are growing, and (maybe most importantly) our own company on this parenting journey.
It's cold in my part of the world today. The autumn leaves, vivid and gorgeous, are all over--on the trees, falling, and on the ground. This year, I feel more attuned to nature's teachings than ever, and I keep watching the trees and reflecting on myself.
The trees are letting go of leaves so beautifully, releasing into their winter stage. The leaves weren't a problem, they were wonderful, but their time is done.
And I'm watching and asking, what am I ready to release? Old stories? The image of who I should be? Habits and patterns? Ideas about my kids? I am feeling the pull to turn inward and enjoy the dark and the cold and the quiet of late fall and winter.
How about you, what are you ready to release? Where does your energy want to go?
To be willing to vote, even when we don't know if our candidate or party will win, is a lot like setting a boundary for a child when we don't think they're going to listen. It can feel hopeless, helpless, insignificant. We can feel angry or frustrated. It dredges up all of the old times we've not felt like our voice mattered.
It is an act of faith. A willingness to show up and be ourselves, to speak our truth.
And a democracy, just like a family, thrives on truth. A democracy may shift slowly rather than immediately in response to each person's vote, as a child often shifts slowly in response to our leadership, but every vote resonates in the community, in the hearts and souls and minds of members of the democracy. Every single person who votes makes an impact.
In our families and in our communities and country, each of us matters. Vote today!
This morning, I am grateful to be alive.
Life, simply being here, is a beautiful thing.
Even when I'm practicing gratitude I don't always notice this most basic gift, but today I am aware of it.
I am blessed to be here for this moment in the world,
for this moment in the lives of those I know and love,
listening to the bird calling outside the window
on this foggy, cool morning.
I'm a person on a messy journey--healing, learning, discovering and rediscovering. Sharing, writing, talking, and teaching help me to understand myself and the world more clearly. I hope it can help make your journey a easier, too.